Thursday 28 January 2016

'this line is too big' i said 
we all wanted to leave so we waited ten more minutes and we where barly moving so we left. Me and my aunt and her friend went to the ferris wheel but I was the only one who wanted to go on the line was at the top it stopped working so I thot I will be off in a few minutes so they pushed me down and then I went back up so I thot it will be next time but it wasn't I was up there for 2 hours then I got down finally I thot so they gave me a pass to skip a line so my whole family and I went on the ride we have been waiting for the whole day

1 comment:

  1. I think you could put the line is too long instead of the line is too big. You could also try to use me, my Aunt and her friend instead of me and my Aunt and her friend. The story that you are trying to tell was good but can you fix some lines so the story will flow better.

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